Mischievous angels in heaven must be toying with us

Tag : rubber str
Yet this whole bird flu thing bothers me. I find it reallydifficult to cower at the sight of chicken fillets, although I'veseen crowds fleeing in terror from the sight of a dearly departedhen. To me, dead chickens are the stuff of comedians' valises. Ihave been known to carry around a rubber chicken myself, and manyprofessional journalists consider it a standard item in theirtoolkit. How did they become the biggest threat to human life?
It can only be clear proof of the existence of the Great Big Senseof Irony in the sky. The same could be said for HIV-AIDS. I reckonthe only possible explanation is that there must have been some bigdebate in the Plagues Department of heaven, some time in the 1980s.Angel One: "I miss the old days, when we would regularly destroythe whole world with massive plagues."
Angel Two: "There's nothing to stop us doing some more. This is theage of irony. Let's do some ironic plagues."
Angel One: "Great idea. Let's take something that everybody likes,and make it lethal."
Angel Two: "Blue skies? Hello Kitty? How about chocolate?"
Angel One: "Nah. Everybody already knows sunshine gives you skincancer and candy is bad for you. How about sex? We could make sexlethal."
And so HIV-AIDS was created. A few years later, the angels met tosee how things had panned out on Earth.
Angel One: "That ironic plague certainly shook things up. Time foranother. How about finding some really boring domestic animal andmaking it lethal?"
Angel Two: "You mean like horses or dogs or something?"
Angel One: "How about kittens?"
And so SARS was created, along with a rumor that it was carried byfelines: thousands of kittens were abandoned across Asia.
A few years later, the angels met again.
Angel One: "I've got an idea for the ultimate ironic plague. We'regoing to take the least scary items in the world and make peoplepetrified of them: chicken nuggets."
And so bird flu was created. At regular intervals, bird flu panicsweeps through Asia and chicken fast food shops lock their doors.
Now, according to my reading, plagues normally come in sets of 10,so there should be seven more. What's next? I have no idea, but I'mkind of amused by the image of people backing away in horrorwhenever they see the Hello Kitty logo. Oh. You already do?
One of the worst plagues infecting the internet is the website at:www.vittachi.com