Why Emirati men marry foreign women

Tag : women's scarf


I was with my sister at a department store, and I saw an Emiratiman with what I assumed was his wife. He was holding her hand andshe was dressed in an abaya (the black cloak that most of usEmirati women wear) and the shaylah (head scarf). In fact, she worethis traditional dress like the Emirati women. Had they not stoppedclose by me, I would have never known that his wife was not Emiratibut Eastern European (which I detected from her accent).
As my sister spoke of what she was going to buy, my mind went intoa series of questions about the implications of the growing numberof Emirati men marrying foreign women.
In the case of this couple I wondered, what would the identity oftheir children be? As a mother plays a critical role in building achild's character, specifically their sense of religion, language,heritage and identity.
The fact is that the phenomenon of Emirati men marrying foreignwomen is an issue of personal freedom - a freedom which I totallyrespect and support. But the implications of this phenomenon arepart of a bigger issue which range from the dilution of ournational identity to the growing number of un-married Emiratiwomen. The other implications are rising divorce rates due tonon-compatible cultures, marriages of convenience to obtain Emiraticitizenship, and lack of fairness which emerges from the UAEcitizenship that is easily granted to a foreign woman who marriesan Emirati man and her children, while the children of an Emiratiwoman married to a foreigner are not fully entitled to it.
So why are Emirati men increasingly marrying foreign women?Fundamentally, we as a people have not changed. However, thephenomenal growth of our society has changed our social landscape,which in turn has had an impact on our behaviour, and priorities.The change in the social landscape is reflected in our cosmopolitansociety, high standard of living and access to material wealth andluxurious lifestyles.
This phenomenal growth has also brought with it some challenges.For example, the rapid development of our nation has attracted manypeople to our country, amongst them single foreign women who inmany cases come from societies where dating and non-maritalrelations are part of the social norms. The growing number of thesesingle women in our society does impact the behaviour of Emiratimen. In the past, many Emirati men would marry early, but today weare witnessing a lot of them delaying marriage as there is anabundance of single and willing women, and a lively dating scene.Quite often, these men end up marrying the woman they date.
Our traditional values of strict segregation in terms ofsocialising of Emirati men and Emirati women have also limited theability of Emirati men to respectfully meet eligible young Emiratiwomen in public and respectable social manner. On the other hand,these same Emirati men can easily socialise with foreign women,which means that the greater interaction between foreign women andEmirati men naturally results in a higher probability of an Emiratiman getting to know more foreign women and increases the chance ofmarrying a foreigner.
Lifestyle
The access to luxurious lifestyles has also created an imbalance interms of priorities, so we find many young men preferring a fastcar and a girl friend to a home, wife and children. Materialism hasalso created a demand for higher dowries thereby deterring manyEmirati men from marrying Emirati women.
Today, there is an awakening. Yes for a young nation of 37 years,we have achieved in a short time span what once people called theimpossible. At the same time, we increasingly realise that if takenfor granted, we can lose everything in the blink of an eye.
So we need to actively work to preserve our national identity. Weneed to encourage Emiratis to marry Emiratis to strengthen ourvalue system, our heritage and our sense of civic duty. We need toget rid of anachronistic traditions that do not allow youngEmiratis to socialise publicly in a respectable manner and allowingthem to potentially meet their life-partner. We need to balance outour passion for material belongings and a noble sense of purpose inlife.
As Emiratis we have to continue to be bold and to keep up themomentum of development, but we also need to take each step withmuch wisdom and thought, and not to consider our personal actionsonly as they pertain to us as individuals, but to also consider howour personal choices affect us collectively, as a people, and as anation.
Najla Al Awadhi is a member of the Federal National Council, DeputyCEO Dubai Media Incor-porated and General Manager of Dubai One TV.