More people should walk a mile in my glued-together shoes

Tag : shoes
More people should walk a mile in my glued-together shoes 08:46 AM CDT on Sunday, September 28, 2008
If I hadn't glued my shoes, we probably wouldn't be having thisdiscussion.
But I did. And so for the last several weeks, my family has beendebating the difference between "frugal" and"cheap."
So what do those words mean to you?
For me, the difference is easy to identify. Frugal is a virtue.Cheap is a vice.
And quite naturally, I consider myself frugal.
Would you be surprised that my family thinks I'm cheap?
In hindsight, I probably should have hidden the shoes instead ofleaving them on the kitchen table, all covered in clamps.
This is an old pair of athletic shoes that I now use as myyard-mowing shoes. (Yes, I mow my own yard. I'm frugal.)
Well, the soles on the shoes began to come loose. And you can't mowwith floppy clown shoes. So I just shot a little epoxy between thesoles and shoes, clamped them tight and somehow started a whole bigdebate.
I was especially disturbed that some in my family said there's nodifference between frugal and cheap. "Isn't 'frugal' just anice way of saying 'cheap'?" offered my sweet daughter-in-law.
No, no, no! That's why we're in the midst of this nationalfinancial crisis. Frugality isn't a euphemism. It's something tostrive for, something to admire and respect.
I recently received a letter from a Dallas lawyer whose kids attenda private school in North Dallas. He is worried that his kids seemto be the only ones hearing a certain important phrase:
"We can't afford it."
The lawyer said he heard that phrase a lot growing up, not becausehis family was poor but simply because he was being taught thatsaving a dollar is often a wiser course than spending one.
But he said, "This simple phrase is now consideredunacceptable, embarrassing or an admission."
And worse, he said, the free-spending, deep-debt attitude hascarried over into government, putting our economic future at risk.
We really have become unmoored from the basic idea that spendingought to be about needs, not desires. We live in a time whenphrases like "recreational shopping" and "retailtherapy" are tossed about with a laugh.
More chilling to me is the new business term "aspirationalmarketing." It's all about selling status symbols to peoplewho can't really afford them, who just aspire to.
We used to call that "living beyond your means." Andmaybe I'm frugal partly because I heard that phrase used with suchdisapproval.
It was one of the many forms of "trashy behavior."
I will admit that I may be out there somewhere at the far end offrugal.
A young colleague laughed at me recently when he saw me carefullyfolding my brown paper lunch sack for reuse. (Yes, I carry my lunchmost days. I'm frugal, remember?)
I have a hard time throwing away a paper clip – even if itbelongs to the company.
The fees they charge for calling directory assistance and for usingother banks' ATMs strike me as outrageous. I just won't do it.
But I'm not cheap. And here's one place I draw a line.
A frugal person will save that stack of excess napkins they giveyou at fast-food restaurants for later use. A cheap person will grab extra napkins for later use.
I haven't sunk that far yet.
I just consider myself frugal. And as our economy teeters fromexcess spending, I wish a few more people would try walking in mywell-glued shoes.