A guide to eccentric glamour

Tag : fancy slippers

What is eccentric glamour? Let me answer that question with anotherquestion: Have you ever understood the futility of a life spentasking “Does my bum look big in this?” Thepointlessness of a life lived without a dab of daring panache?Glamour, ladies, is the birthright of every woman. It is thatmysterious, shimmering, you-know-it-when- you-see-it quality thatsurrounds those who stand out from the crowd.
One way to get to the heart of the matter is to dissect four modernpairings: Mr and Mrs Clinton, Paris and Nicole, Posh and Becks, andMiss Piggy and Kermit. Has gobs of glamour: Bill Clinton, NicoleRichie, David Beckham and Miss Piggy. Has less glamour thanpartner: Hillary Clinton, Paris Hilton, Victoria Beckham andKermit.
Glamour is inextricably bound up with intelligence, humour, and/oraccomplishment. Therefore, Bill and Nicole win out over Hillary andParis because they are smarter and more fun. David Beckham radiatesmore glamour than his missus because of his athletic prowess. MissPiggy and Kermit? Sometimes, all you need is a few French phrasesand an unassailable belief in your own innate fabulousness.
Eccentric glamour is the next step up from glamour. It is aninvigorating mixture of the expected and the unexpected, thehabitual with the kooky, the constant and the kapow! (Miss Piggyis, by the way, the overall winner in this category.)
To claim it, think of the basic elements of your personal style.Let’s call them your style constants. Whether it’s aglossy, jet-black ponytail, a saucy beauty mark, a nuclearexplosion of natural red curls or a penchant for livid-green tangoshoes, every gal needs a repertoire of well-chosen style constants.Simultaneously communicating and defining your unique identity,these flourishes are unaffected by fleeting trends or the whims offashion. They are the glamorous foundations that will remain withyou through thick and thin (literally and figuratively).
Now take your style constants and punctuate them with a jolt of theunexpected: a rhinestone bucket bag, a pair of mariachi slacks, avintage Pucci poncho. Et voilà! Eccentric glamour is thehappy result.
Do today’s celebs possess eccentric glamour? No! Red-carpetglamour is the antithesis of eccentric glamour. Hiring a stylistwho scrounges free frocks on your behalf from top designers doesnot really qualify as “creative expression”. Andtoday’s celebs are, for the most part, much too chicken, toorisk-averse, too scared of those what-were-they-thinking pages inweekly magazines to indulge in eccentric glamour. When the chipsare down, there are three roads that lead to the kingdom ofeccentric glamour: gypsy, existentialist and socialite. The gypsyis the ethereal, poetic, arty, bohemian face of eccentric glamour.Think Julia Roberts in her current mom-living-at-the-beach mode.The existentialist is infinitely more severe, dramatic, graphic andintellectual; while the gypsy is all about the flesh, theexistentialist is all about the mind. Think edgy. Think beatnik.Think Annie Lennox or Chrissie Hynde. The socialite is heavy on thegloss, light on the eccentricity. She radiates old-school glamour.She is lacquered, designer-clad, high-heel addicted, manicured,elegant and slightly bitchy. Think Anna Wintour. Think Jackie O.
There is no need to feel pigeon-holed or confined by these threecategories. Within each group there are, as you will see, endlessnuances and permutations that allow for unlimited personalexpression.
THE GYPSY
There is much to recommend the gypsy lifestyle. First, it’sincredibly romantic. Imagine yourself living in a yurt, callingyour children in to dinner by banging a beribboned tambourine onyour hip. You can be wild. You can be Carmen. While existentialistchicks feel obliged to imbue everything with solemnity and meaning,you gypsies can shriek and bite the air — raaar! — justbecause you feel like it. Imagine whirling around a campfire in aflouncy cheesecloth skirt, flashing your eyes, not to mention thosevintage embroidered Victorian bloomers you found at the fleamarket, at a group of swarthy, adoring, monosyllabic blokes withgold teeth. What could be more dreamy?
Within the gypsy group there are endless variations and genres.Here are four of my favourites.
THE EUROGLAM GYPSY
A throwback to the YSL rich hippies of the early 1970s —think Marisa Berenson or Talitha Getty — the euroglam gypsyis a show-off who loves ethnic fabrics, finger cymbals,appliqués, rickrack and fringing. Her idea of heaven is tobe shot for Vogue while getting her hands hennaed by aleathery-faced crone in some far-flung, hectic marketplace.
Jade Jagger, left, is the contemporary queen of the euroglamgypsies. The daughter of Mick and Bianca has built a whole brandidentity simply by floating about her house in Ibiza, rimming hereyes with kohl and festooning her walls with sari fabrics. Whilethe euroglam gypsy is at great pains not to appear wealthy orbourgeois, she usually has a bit of money tucked away. Fashionmodels often become euroglam gypsies when they pass their sell-bydate: see Helena Christensen. These gals have accumulated the kindof shekels needed to bankroll the indolent euroglam gypsylifestyle.
What does she wear? Matthew Williamson and Duro Olowu are euroglamgypsy favourites. A major flea-market hag, she is always scouringthe stalls for a vintage Ossie Clarke, Thea Porter or ZandraRhodes.
Is she loyal to this style? Yes! These gals are lifers. Though shemay tidy herself up for funerals and court appearances, it isalmost unheard of for a euroglam to become a socialite. This wouldinvolve having her tattoos removed and bidding adieu to all herfriends, freaks and acquaintances.
THE ISADORA GYPSY
Named after Isadora Duncan, left, that crazy chick who leapedaround barefoot in the dirt waving a piece of chiffon and, as aresult, invented the concept of modern dance. The Isadora gypsy hasa strong theatrical sense and loves dressing up: she wears pannevelvet and vintage lace, and medieval robes and turbans à laEdith Sitwell.
She adores enormous rings, beading and devoré. Her dream isto find a vintage Fortuny tea gown. She is more cultured, bettereducated and less trendy than her euroglam sister. Virginia Woolfis her favourite writer; olive green is her preferred hue.
She is prone to bouts of melancholy. She does not have thereservoirs of happy superficiality that keep the euroglam gypsyshrieking with laughter 24/7. While the euroglam is knocking backchampagne at Art Basel in Miami, the Isadora is far more likely tobe found contemplating the translucency of an art nouveau vase onthe Portobello Road or weeping quietly in the corner of VitaSackville-West’s all-white garden in Kent.
Contemporary celebrity examples? Cate Blanchett and Tilda Swintonhave an Isadora/existentialist thing going on, which make them thedarlings of the high-fashion monde.
Caution: the Isadora gypsy is accident-prone. She is quite likelyto drown while having an Ophelia moment in a fast-running stream,or, like the original Isadora, get throttled when her scarf getscaught in the wheels of her sports car. Her death, though oftenunexpected, is never mundane.
THE GREEN GYPSY
If sustainability and fair trade are more important to you thangypsy glamour — that is, you prefer hemp flip-flops totowering espadrilles by Christian Louboutin — you may well bea green gypsy. Formerly known as the Birkenstock gypsy, the greengypsy is a fast-growing category in Hollywood. Inspired by greencelebs such as Leo and Brad, more and more young lasses —think Kate Hudson, left, or Liv Tyler — are looking forenvironmentally responsible, organic garments. Especially if theyare knocked up or just hanging out at their £5m Malibu beachshacks.
Warning: just because a garment is made of organic cotton does notmean it has the allure and sizzle that are part and parcel of theeccentric-glamour lifestyle. Try to be ruthlessly objective whenbuying and accessorising green garments. Do not sacrifice style forsustainability. At the end of the day, a burlap tabard is just aburlap tabard. Unless you team it with a pair of Stella McCartneycruelty-free black patent-leather spikes, you run the risk oflooking as if you are an extra in a suburban production of TheCanterbury Tales.
Psych alert: while the euroglam gypsy tends toward superficiality,the green gypsy, with her solar panels, compost toilet and constantanxieties about the size of her carbon footprint, is excruciatinglyearnest. If you enter this category, please try not to become adogmatic bore.
THE HOLLYWOOD GYPSY
The patron saint of Hollywood gypsies is Ali MacGraw.
She is the well-scrubbed Malibu version of gypsy style. In hercrisp, white kaftans and discreet jewellery, yoga-loving Ali is theacceptable face of hippie, a woman with alternative ideals, asizeable bank account and no body odour or armpit hair.
As they age, these Hollywood gypsies can sometimes becomesocialites. This can elicit accusations of betrayal by the greengypsies, who often work at the health-food stores or yoga centrespatronised by the Hollywood gypsies.
Eccentric Glamour by Simon Doonan is published on July 7 (Simon& Schuster £14.99). To order it for the special price of£13.49 (including p&p), call The Sunday Times BooksFirst0870 165 8585 or visit timesonline.co.uk/booksfirst
NEXT WEEK Find out if you are a socialite or an existentialist glamorouseccentric.
Plus Why French women don’t know diddly squat
PROFILE OF A GYPSY
Tilda Swinton
Q What are you wearing?
One of my son’s Aertex shirts, his father’s corduroyjacket, a daisy chain, a Vivienne Westwood kilt and no shoes.
Q When did you first realise that you might be a glamorouseccentric?
Putting a name to the condition: possibly only when you asked me toparticipate in this falderal, but I did have an inkling fairlyrecently at a Nine Inch Nails concert, when I was stood on in themosh pit by a hobnail boot and realised that I had forgotten tochange out of the towelling slippers from the hotel.
Q Were your parents horrified?
Given that my general father could chew the hind leg off Lesage(François, the legendary couture designer) about the bestways to tissue-wrap gold frogging, I never reckoned they had a legto stand on.
Q Are you prone to mood swings?
No, but don’t tell anyone . . .
Q Have you ever been mocked for any of your glamorouseccentricities?
Naturally. Being broken into mockery at a young age by threebrothers, I learnt early to bear those wounds with great pride.
Q What is the most eccentrically glam thing in your closet?
Possibly a Hubert de Givenchy wool Pierrot dress with a diamondprint that is so lovely, even the fact that it reeks of mothballs— and could that be old-lady pee? — won’t stop mewearing it.
Q Have you ever wished you could trade in your life of glamorouseccentricity for one of dreary conformity?
No need to trade. I happily cultivate at least two entirelyseparate and distinct looks, and yet mix’n’matchperfectly integrated lives. I’m finding it hard to work outwhich could best be described as glam eccentric and which drearyconformity. The Highland Hospice charity shops that dot everyvillage in the north of Scotland are where I live out my MissMarple comes to Warmington-on-Sea fantasies. Invariably moreenticing in every way than the drudgery of the high-chrome road.
Q When does eccentric glamour become idiocy?
When it is perpetrated with the aid of a solemn looking glass.
Q Who is your inspirational icon of glamorous eccentricity?
My fearless and sensationally chic grandmother and my nine-year-olddaughter.
Q Do men think you are hot?
Of course they do — whether they admit it or not.
Q What is the thing that most offends your glamorously eccentricsensibilities?
The death knell: witless good taste.
Q Where do you wish to be buried and in what?
In a shallow grave of sand, done up to the nines in a huge flowerychiffon dress stretched out like a sail on a beach in the Hebrides,pecked to pieces by birds.
The girl who has it all
Some of you will be a combo of gypsy/ existentialist/ socialiteglamour; a small number will bounce around effortlessly among allthree. The world’s best-known glamour all-rounder? Kate Moss.
8am Kate skips through customs after a sun-drenched Saint Bartsphotoshoot, looking every inch the bedraggled bohemian gypsy in hotpants, mini kaftan and embroidered pashmina.
Lunchtime There’s Kate in a quirky black Marc Jacobs or Balenciagaensemble — knee-high black boots, opaque black tights,minikilt, military-style fitted jacket — having anexistentialist chat and a pint of beer with an enigmatic musicianfriend in a pub.
As the sun sets La Moss is snapped vamping off to a fancy opening on the arm ofKarl Lagerfeld in vintage bijoux and a Chanel gown, looking likethe complete groovy socialite.